I remember being ignored as a young
child when I was not on my best behaviour. My mother taught me through her
response that I will only get attention if I behave. Thinking back, when I was
about four or five, my mother was heavily pregnant with my younger sister, it
was not possible for her to give her 100% attention to me.
Isn't life the same? It is just not
possible to give 100% attention to everything in our lives. Something has got
to give. I prefer to ignore things that do not improve my life, do good or make
me a better person.
We pay attention to too much these
days. In this social media age, it is almost as if we can't help but pay
attention to stuff and everything. It is just in our faces, 24/7.
On top of it all, we pay too much
attention to how we feel when we get hooked on other people's social media
postings. When we start comparing our lives with the lives of others, the lower
ego just wants to hook in its tentacles of negative emotions into our system
and suck all the joy and happiness out of us because it is only doing its job.
We, on the other hand, are not entirely doing our job of staying in joy and
happiness. We feel let down by others or by ourselves, thinking that we are not
as good as others and we are undeserving, and so the spiral goes on. We are
just paying too much attention to stuff that does not matter to us.
We also pay too much attention to
other people's opinions. I hear too many people say things like; I don't care
what other people think. Well, if you do not care, you wouldn't care even to
make that statement! The fact that you also said it, only means you have put
some thought into it, giving it too much attention to warrant this sort of
response.
So what is enough attention? How do
we strike a balance of paying attention to what matters and what doesn't? And
how do we even know what is worth paying attention to when there is so much
stuff out there!
I use a filtering system in my mind
to make split-second decisions on what matters. It's an easy filter consisting
of FIVE WORDS.
Does it give me joy?
Every time I come across people,
their opinions, their social media posts, whatever it may be, my filter goes,
Does it give me joy? I get my answer. If it gives me the joy to see other
people happy, I say so; I support it with all my heart. If it gives me the joy
to pick up something new as part of my work, I do it wholeheartedly. Because I
believe in doing something well or not at all.
This filtering system is so easy
because when it comes to things that do not matter, eg. opinions of other
people of how you should live your life, the answer is obvious and I just go
about my life, my way, no matter what others say or how they gossip about
behind my back.
However, this simple filtering system
does not work as efficiently when it comes to my loved ones. I believe it has
to be taken one notch up because your loved ones matter more and so more
attention and care must be given to them. So instead of the simple filtering
system, I take time to listen to their negative voices sometimes. But when it
becomes too much, as they do when it comes to loved ones and family, I
automatically ask myself:
Do I choose peace and love?
This question gives me somewhat of an
answer on how to deal with the situation at hand. It is not always perfect, but
hey, it is a learning process.
Join me, and make "Does it give
me joy?" your mantra today
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9896014
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